Let’s Talk About Money Management
Do you find yourself wondering how you and your spouse could be so compatible but so different with how you handle/manage money? Do you find most conversations about money frequently lead to arguments and frustration, or do one of you just avoid it all together? It is natural and human to avoid things that make us uncomfortable thanks to our critter brain.
Money creates deep feelings in most of us that we usually don’t even notice. Believe it or not, it does to me too! Yes, the financial planner!
I found myself in this exact situation time and time again with my husband. Both of us are educated and have worked in banking our entire careers––it’s even where we met––yet discussing our financial affairs turned out to be the hardest and most frustrating conversations, and would even lead to arguments from time to time. I would leave the conversation feeling hurt and angry, asking myself why does this need to be so difficult, we both know better? Why can’t he understand what I am trying to say? What is wrong with us!?!
Transform Your Money Talks Into Productive Conversation
I’ve helped hundreds of clients year after year with their money, organizing their financials, determining their goals, and mapping out retirement. Why couldn’t I get my own husband to do this? This led me to what I now know how to do best: RESEARCH! Working with divorce attorneys, I learned quickly money had a big impact on couples divorcing. There had to be a common underlining factor. And I found it was almost always COMMUNICATION.
At the end of the day, I learned it wasn’t his lack of education or desire to talk about money. It wasn’t lack of anything. It was my COMMUNICATION STYLE to him. We are all raised differently with different life experiences. These experiences shape us. They shape how we view the world around us. They shape how we take in information and how we relay information to others. Once I was able to determine my way wasn’t the only way that was right (HA!) I was able to step back and take a different approach until I found the right one.
When we determined our own communication styles and money types, we were able to meet in the middle and learned how to make these money discussions productive. The added bonus was the enormous weight lifted off our shoulders once we were able to get on the same page. Since then, we have been able to achieve some very monumental money goals and now money isn’t a thorn in our side but a tool we work together to use.
I am excited to be able to share this with you. One of the first steps we will take is to determine your money type and communication style. This has also been most beneficial with couples by reducing those frustrating conversations. Once we are able to proceed forward together anything is possible!